The Diner

Several years ago I would have this reocurring dream about my dad. We were sitting in a diner, me at a current age and him just before he died, 36. So we are sitting there talking about everything, nothing, I don't know. I just knew it was him and the way I rememberred him. Mmmm, he smelled like old spice. His smile, what a beautiful smile. I remember feeling so safe, so taken care of. So smitten with my daddy.
Hanging on the wall right above us in this round diner booth is a huge round clock. In the background of our conversations was "tick, tick, tick, tick"
In the beginning of the dream I felt so wonderful to be with my "daddy" but by the middle of the dream "tick, tick, tick" gets louder and faster.
Somehow I knew that when that clock hit 9o'clock he had to leave and he had to leave and never come back. Oh how I began to cry to him, for him as that hour hand crept to nine o'clock.."tick, tick, ticktickticktickticktick" Lots of tears, fears, saddness I can't understand he has to go, why would you leave me? Why can't you stay here and keep me safe and care for me forever? So smitten with my daddy, don't you go...what could be more important. How could you leave your baby girl? Why would you leave your baby girl? Oh, he hung my moon! And yet that stupid clock, "tick, tick, tick,tick,tick,tick" I HATE that clock!!!!!! Don't go, why does he get up, why does he go anyway, don't go, will I ever see you again, where are you going, why would you go!?!?!?!
And soon I wake up not to recover soon from such a dream.